How to succeed in dating a Capricorn without really trying

I must begin this edition of Unsolicited Astrological Opinions with a warning. I am extremely biased on this particular topic. I'm currently dating a sea-goat and he's the most fantastic man of all time. It takes a lot of my energy each day when someone says something kind about their significant other to not Kanye the absolute fuck out of them. I know full and well if I do talking to me would be a dreadful task, so I don't. Ta dah! Problem solved.

Anyhow, I've revealed one of the biggest secrets of dating a Capricorn male. In the title. For the benefit of everyone, don't EVER chase someone who was born under a Cardinal sign. Aries, Cancer, Libra and Capricorn. If you do you will ruin their fun. Even the sweetie-pie Cancer still has a deep driven desire to impress you, hypnotize you with their personality and draw you towards them (as opposed to chasing you). Please don't ruin someone's good time 'cause then the both of you are gonna have a bad time.

Just don't do it. K?

The Libran Redneck

The Libran Redneck

What first inspired me to start explaining astrological characteristics in the average country citizen was spotting a red pick-up truck. This beauty was a pleasant red Ford, a model from the early to mid 90s. The paint was perfect, not a speck of rust anywhere and on the back window an assortment of stickers. On this trapezoid-shaped window, there were two "FEAR THIS!" stickers one on each side towards the top. There were two small confederate flag stickers, about seven inches below the "FEAR THIS!" stickers. In the middle of this configuration was a large confederate flag sticker. Use your imaginations and it would look something like this.